It startled me to see our baby’s heartbeat at barely 7 weeks. There on the black and white screen, inside the little bean of a baby was the heart rapidly pumping blood.
145 times a minute.
Our baby has a life-sustaining circulatory system, oxygenated by my blood, and has a brain that is already dictating countless functions.
We are intricately interwoven from the very start.
Long before modern technology, the Creator of life revealed the mystery of unborn life through King David’s song in Psalm 139:13-16,
“For You formed my inward parts;
You covered me in my mother’s womb.
I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Marvelous are Your works,
And that my soul knows very well.
My frame was not hidden from You,
When I was made in secret,
And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.
Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed.
And in Your book they all were written,
The days fashioned for me,
When as yet there were none of them”.
Skillfully wrought.
Formed my inward parts.
My frame is not hidden from the Almighty eyes of God.
These are the words of an artist. And a visionary.
God sees every single day of the yet to come.
And it is with great intentionality He places that blossoming life beneath the heart of a woman.
God knows what He is doing- the quaking miracle of life and the most glorious responsibility of bearing life is given to a woman.
God sees her. Everyone of us.
And I long to see women set free from the lies our society has created in pretense of being for them.
God is for women.
A women’s sole job in life is not to have children. But she is the only one God gives that awesome task.
Why do we not elevate women and the glorious design bestowed on them to cultivate life? While every woman does not carry a child, she is still equipped with a thousand beautiful gifts which nurture, teach, mentor, and bear life in the hearts of others.
Women are life givers, reflecting the heart of a God who gave His own life.
There is an interesting story in the Old Testament of a cast off woman named Hagar. She was the servant of Abraham and Sarah who became pregnant by him and bore the consequences of their disobedience. She was forced to flee into the wilderness, was prepared to die, but couldn’t bear to see her son die. Yet God saw her and intervened. He brought forth water from the dry ground, and promised to bring a mighty nation from her son. She calls Him, “You are the God who sees.”
Her despair is the story of many women. What she needed most was to be seen.
The disheartening reasons that women today find themselves contemplating ending their child’s life remain with them long after the procedure is over. Their unstable environment, lack of support or finances, the trauma from abuse or rape remain. And so does the impact of the pregnancy.
I read recently that fetal cells stay in a women’s body for years after the pregnancy, whether carried to term or not. They actually travel throughout the body and can provide internal healing.
Children are meant to change us.
Abortion has also shaped us.
Abortion causes infertility because of the scarring that it creates, as well potential damage to vital organs. And women who have had an abortion have a 45% higher death rate in general. Each additional abortion is associated with an exponentially higher death rate.
Yet no one wants to talk about this or the death she experiences in her heart.
People like to bring up incest and rape as the big moral question for abortion rights. Why aren’t we enabling women to safely share when they have been violated and offer them options that would prevent further trauma? So much shame is still placed on the women rather than the heinous man who committed these crimes.
I know people say there are medical situations-life and death. Is God not the caretaker of all life?
I am talking about choices.
45% of abortions are repeat abortions. Let that sink in. We are failing women in their reproductive choices if abortion is being used as birth control.
We can’t see that the whole argument for abortion stands on the hypocritical premise of widely taught “free” sex and more birth control access than ever, has failed greatly.
What of the impact on the family?
This choice detaches the responsibility of the father completely from his unborn child. (Ironically, in the case of men who do want to be involved, he has no legal say over his unborn child.)
Why is it a crime if a mother neglects her children, but it is not for a man who abandons his family or a woman he has impregnated? Sure we have child support. We allow an uninvolved man to pay off his responsibilities. I am stepping on a few toes here, but the toes that matter the most are the littlest ones. I grew up receiving child support from my biological dad who paid every cent of what the court deemed he owed. He kept us three weeks out of the year. He did the responsible thing. He spent his money and tried to spend some time, but he never spent his heart. He fathered us, but he isn’t a father- because Fatherhood requires sacrifice.
(Side note- I am beyond thankful I have a father I call Dad, who raised me and all that word entails. Most of all, He pointed me to my heavenly Father.)
In all our declaration of women’s rights, we have done ourselves a great disfavor. We continue to preach “free” sex which in reality benefits men almost entirely. Sexually transmitted disease causes far more damage on a woman’s reproductive system and puts her at higher risk for cancers.
Women are the ones who bear the heaviest scars and wounds of sexual relationships that don’t require commitment.
We were made for a love that stays.
Yet God’s love is long-suffering, “I have loved you with an everlasting love” Jeremiah 31:3.
I am not here to anger or shame anyone who has walked through tough decisions or knows someone dear who has. The Creator only sees some of the horrendous circumstances women have faced.
He is for you, not against you.
Do not underestimate the miracles that can unfold in your life through His redemptive power.
I want to turn swirling debates towards how we can support women and turn around the circumstances they are in.
Let’s revisit adoption as the beautiful, sacrificial choice that it is. Let’s give a mother time to heal, to choose wisely, and still let go of her responsibility of parenting if needed, with the support she should have.
Adoption gives a mother the gift to see redemption birthed from hard places.
Let’s start treating women with all the honesty they deserve, dignity, respect, and love.
Let’s not allow for the dismissal of a woman and her unfolding story.
Because love enfolds her, no matter her choice, and sees her as God does- made in His image from day one of life.
Jeremiah 1:5
Movement in a Mercurial World 